Permission to Unplug

Happy Holidays!  I just returned from a two-week international vacation, and it was amazing.  I have not taken that much time off at once, other than maternity leave, since 1993!  In addition to being away that long, we literally had no internet or access to our phones for 5 of those days.  So, I was forced to unplug.  It got me thinking about our work ethics and how much we rely on technology to communicate.  It also has made me realize that with such ready access to technology and its associated conveniences, it is not easy to step away. 

According to data from DataReportal, published in March of 2023, the average American spends 7 hours a day looking at a screen.  I would argue that number is much higher for many of us.  They broke the seven hours down into: 2 hours and 30 minutes looking at social media channels, 1 hour and 30 minutes streaming music and 1 hour and 12 minutes listening to podcasts.  As I read this, it doesn’t appear to include the amount of time spent on computers, watching television, texting, or playing video games.  That has me concerned because if that is the case, clearly the number would be much, much higher.  As I am sure most of us have noticed, it is rare to see a teen without their phone these days. When I investigated the amount of time adolescents spend on their screens, the averages ranged from 7 hours and 30 minutes to 8 hours and 30 minutes. YIKES! I worry about the impact screens have on social skills, human to human interaction, and overall balance.

At first, it took my husband and I time to adjust to the lack of access to technology.  The hardest part was not being able to call and check in with our two kids.  Other than that, I kind of loved not having access.  It was nice to step away from life and just “be,” to allow ourselves to be present in the moment and with each other, and allow the blessings of our situation to sink in.  I know we cannot avoid technology, even though I try to on many occasions (I still use a paper calendar for Pete’s sake).  I also acknowledge that there are many benefits to having access to technology and all the information we literally have at our fingertips.  I do, however, worry about the deficits of technology, most specifically as it relates to boundary setting, overuse of technology and the negative impacts it can have on stress, self-esteem, and confidence. 

When we have ready access to information, we run the risk of comparing ourselves to others, “doom scrolling” and hyper focusing on all that is wrong with the world and, we feel slighted if people don’t respond instantaneously to our messages, not to mention the impact chronic screen use can have on our vision and development and overall ability to regulate. 

There is such a push for instantaneous feedback that we may inadvertently lose the skills of patience and tolerance, something that is desperately needed these days.  I worry that over reliance on technology has prevented us from developing and maintaining some critical skills.  Think about it, how many of us rely on the calculator on our phones to do math?  How many of us have lost some skills in writing etiquette, spelling, and overall communication due to quick access to spell check, abbreviated words used in texting, and over reliance on the world wide web to get us facts instead of using our old, developed skills of doing true research.   Back in the day, when I had to write a paper, I had to go to the card catalog, look up the Dewey decimal number and then find the book on the shelf.  I am not even sure kids these days would even know what a card catalog is! We know these short cuts are time saving and very useful. I also know that we must ensure that our youth are learning the skills of proper communication, how to do effective research and the basic ability to have healthy and intelligent human to human conversations.

I have many teammates and colleagues who struggle with boundary setting when it comes to technology, often checking emails at night and on the weekends.  They feel tied to their phones and computers should somebody need them or should something happen.  We feel obligated to respond on our free time because it will, “just take a second.”  How many of us have contacted a colleague who we know is on vacation or who is ill and home recovering because we just can’t wait until they return?  These, “it will only take a moment” situations can add up to quite a bit of time.  What is that doing to our ability to take care of our health and wellness?

Time is precious and there will never be enough of it.  There will always be “something” to do.  The list will continue to grow, and the tasks needed to accomplish will always be there.  At some point, we must focus on our health and wellness and be willing and able to not only set boundaries for ourselves and keep them but to also not violate another person’s boundaries in the process.  Our need may not be their need in the moment.  Our crisis may not be their crisis.  And, unless true safety is at risk, it will still be there tomorrow. 

Research indicates that we should be spending no more than 2 hours each day on recreational screen time.  That is significantly less than the average stated earlier in this blog post.  What could we do with that additional 5 hours each day if we were to “unplug” from our screens a bit more?  Would we sleep better, have more human-to-human interaction, feel less stress?  Those options seem quite lovely if you ask me.

So, my holiday wish for you this season is to practice unplugging.  Step away from technology and enjoy your loved ones.  Take a walk, read a book, play a game, take a nap, and have some incredible belly laughs.  That is my plan this holiday season.  I am going to practice the 10 things every day and set some boundaries around a balanced and healthy day.

My New Year’s Resolutions this year for work are to:

1.       Finish the 3rd book!

2.       Finish the workbook with Pete and Keith!

3.       Get one Children’s book published!

4.       Continue to work with amazing folks all around the world who believe in me and this work!

My Personal Resolutions this year are to:

1.       Try and do the 10 things each day!

2.       Give myself a bit more grace!

3.       Find a way to improve my sleep!

4.       Laugh more!

5.       Appreciate all the people and the blessings I have in my life!

Help hold me accountable to these wishes for myself in 2024.  I hope you set some goals for yourself that will support you in being your best and most healthy selves.  I appreciate all of you and am so grateful for all that you do! 

Cheers to 2023 and let’s have a kick ass 2024!

Kristin